To the Bookstore and Beyond!

One of my favorite activities is spending a leisurely morning (afternoon or evening) at a bookstore that has a coffee bar and lots and lots of magazines and unusual book titles – not just the bestsellers. I have discovered some of my favorite non-fiction authors in this way: Daniel Boorstin, Stephen Jay Gould, Sarah Ban Breathnach, Gregg Levoy, Clarissa Pinkola Estes and many others.

My bookcases overflow with books which I plan to read and also with the treasures that I’ve finished and believe I must keep for reference. Books open new worlds of thought that help me know more about myself and those with whom I come into contact.

The worlds I've discovered in books have enriched my life more than I can ever express. Years ago, I overheard the conversation of some friends discussing something they wanted to learn and said they’d just get a book to instruct them on how to go about it. As peculiar as it seems now, I remember being a bit stunned to think I could learn something without formal instruction. Those were the days before the Internet and learning anything involved studying the library’s card catalog and hoping for the best. But, man-oh-man, the vistas this opened. I’ve spent hours at the library researching first one thing and then another – and for free! Amazing!

My friends say that I can carry on a conversation with a fence post and eventually get it to answer me. Some of this is a result of all that I have absorbed through reading. I know a little bit about a lot of things. However, I also learned how to be an engaging conversationalist by reading, How to Win Friends and Influence People, by Dale Carnegie. For years, I continued to be too shy to fully practice what I’d learned, but the concepts were swirling in my brain awaiting my willingness to jump into conversations and contribute.

Today, with television as a learning-tool, many people engage in monologues instead of conversations, as conversation involves two or more people talking, not one talking non-stop. Have you ever met anyone who talks at you, but not with you, as they don’t ask you questions to include you, but they talk on and on, often repeating themselves trying to find a way to tie up their thoughts?

In How to Win Friends and Influence People, Dale Carnegie outlines how to ask questions, listen to the answers and respond thoughtfully. I believe if this book were required reading for every middle school student in America, there would be a lot less angst during those years of insecurity and awkwardness. We wouldn’t have to make fun and rail against others as we’ve learned on television, by listening to Homer Simpson and others, but would know how to be interesting, conversational and kind when talking.

How to Win Friends and Influence People; great book for anyone who struggles in social settings, from one who has struggled.

Also, another fun book I found during one of my obscure title quests is, The List, by Gail Belsky. The book, as its title states, is a list which explores ninety-nine adventures by women who made decisions about what they wanted to do, researched how to go about it, determined dates to venture forth and then followed through. The book tells of yearnings as diverse as swimming with sea creatures to joining a cattle drive; setting up a web site or buying yourself a sex toy. There are ninety-five others just as innovative and wacky that sparked creativity within my own mind when I read them.

I made my list:

To finish my book of art and essays and to be published
To have my screenplay about Harry Truman produced by Gary Ross or Rita Wilson and her husband, Tom Hanks
Make a CD before my voice is so decrepit I can no longer hit high C
Finish my one-woman play and actually have the courage to perform it
Learn to belly dance
Go to Yellowstone, Machu Pichu, Alaska and Montana
Learn to sea-kayak
Photograph running wild horses
Attend the Astra writing workshop in Greece
Find out more information about my mysterious Greek great-grandfather
Camp on a lake and awaken to birds singing
Learn to play the violin, bagpipes and banjo
Learn to carve and produce a carousel animal
Learn pottery
Visit Madagascar and photograph Lemurs
Take an African safari and photograph everything in sight…

What would be on your list and how could you make them happen?

As I said, these are the ones that come to mind right now. Considering my age, I wonder when I will make plans to do these things. Without planning, they will not happen.

Life is so much more exciting when I have something to look forward to. I’ll keep you informed.

In the meantime, you will find me at the bookstore, by the coffee bar probably munching a chocolate chip cookie, crouched over a mountain of magazines and books seeing what further adventures await.